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"
"I cannot speak for anyone butmyself."
"Do you want me to hurt you?" Holly said.
I looked up then, gave him my gaze, full on, and let him see the truth. "Oh, yes."
CHAPTER 14
EVENTUALLY THE MIRROR WAS JUST A MIRROR AGAIN. THE GOBLINS would arrive tonight with a guard of Red Caps to make certain this was not sidhe treachery. With Doyle injured, I had to choose new guards to watch us, and frankly the ones I trusted most didn't want the duty.
Frost would have stood with Doyle, if ordered, but he didn't really enjoy seeing me with other men. He was okay with Doyle and himself being in the same room at the same time with me, but he didn't share with anyone else. Rhys was more open-minded about the sharing thing, but it would have been a type of torture to ask him to watch the goblins with me. Being a prisoner of the goblins had been what had cost him one eye.
"You meant that about wanting them to hurt you, didn't you?" Rhys asked.
"Yes," I said.
"Do you know how disturbing that is?"
I thought about it, then nodded. "You either get it, or you don't."
"I do not get it either," Frost said.
I kept quiet because Frost actually got it more than he thought he did. He didn't like causing me pain, but a little "tie me up, tie me down" worked just fine as foreplay for him. But since he didn't consider bondage the same thing as causing pain, I didn't argue with him.
"Doyle gets it," Rhys said.
I nodded.
"You enjoy normal sex, right?" Rhys asked.
"Normal is a judgment. The kind of sex I like is just the kind of sex I like, Rhys."
He took a deep breath and started over. "I don't mean to sound judgmental. What I mean is, do you have less… bondage sex with the rest of us because you think we won't do what you want? I guess I want to know that you really enjoy being with me."
I put my arms around him, but kept us far enough apart so I could gaze up into his face. "I love being with you, all of you. But sometimes I like something rougher. I wouldn't want to have the goblins' idea of sex every night, but the thought does excite me."
He shivered, and it wasn't from pleasure. No, it was definitely fear. "I know now, thanks to you, that only my ignorance of goblin culture cost me my eye. If I hadn't been just another arrogant sidhe, I'd have known that their culture allows even prisoners to negotiate sex. I could have forced them not to maim me. But I saw the sex as torture, and you can't bargain with torture."
"When a goblin tortures you, you'll know it."
He shuddered again.
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