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Cerulean Sins :: Гамильтон Лорел
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He patted my hands between his. "You took four men into that bed over there, four of us, yet you have sex with only Jean-Claude. You feed the ardeur from Nathaniel, but you have not fucked him." He let go of my hands and shook his head, laughing. "Only you could have the strength of will to sleep night after night beside such beauty and not take all that Nathaniel had to offer. I have met saints and priests over the centuries that had not your will to resist temptation."
"I don't seem to be resisting all that much anymore," I said, hands on hips.
He laughed again, smile fading as he did it. "Jason you have put firmly back into the box, marked 'friend. But what of me? I do not wish to join you in that bed again, if tomorrow I will be merely another friend. I cannot bear it."
I frowned up at him. I'd done my best to forget what happened when Belle Morte caused the ardeur to rise months ago. Thanks to her, I'd participated in the closest thing I hoped to ever get to an orgy. No intercourse, but a lot of hands and bodies touching where they shouldn't have been. Asher was right; I'd done my best to ignore the whole thing. Ignore it hard enough, and it never happened. But of course it had happened, and I'd not dealt with it.
"What do you want me to say? I'm sorry that I'm a little squeamish about having been in bed with four men at the same time. Yeah, it embarrassed me, so sue me."
"Tonight will embarrass you, too."
"A lot of things embarrass me, Asher, I can't help that."
"You cannot help but be who and what you are, Anita. I would not change you, but I also will not be just a night of charity in your bed. I tell you I could not bear being cast out again."
I knew in that instant that he didn't mean me casting him out from our bed after the ardeur. He meant what Belle had done to him all those centuries ago. She had thrown him away like a damaged toy. After all, you can always buy more toys.
I started to pace back and forth in front of him, not looking at either of them, but doing something, anything for the nervous energy that was building up. "What do you want from me, Asher? A guarantee?"
"Yes," he said, at last. "That is exactly what I want from you."
I stopped pacing and looked at him. "What kind of guarantee? That I won't freak out about this tomorrow?" I shook my head. "I'm sorry, I can't promise, because I don't know how I'll feel."
"What will Micah say, if he finds out you've been with me?"
"Micah is okay with it."
Asher looked at me.
He patted my hands between his. "You took four men into that bed over there, four of us, yet you have sex with only Jean-Claude. You feed the ardeur from Nathaniel, but you have not fucked him." He let go of my hands and shook his head, laughing. "Only you could have the strength of will to sleep night after night beside such beauty and not take all that Nathaniel had to offer. I have met saints and priests over the centuries that had not your will to resist temptation."
"I don't seem to be resisting all that much anymore," I said, hands on hips.
He laughed again, smile fading as he did it. "Jason you have put firmly back into the box, marked 'friend. But what of me? I do not wish to join you in that bed again, if tomorrow I will be merely another friend. I cannot bear it."
I frowned up at him. I'd done my best to forget what happened when Belle Morte caused the ardeur to rise months ago. Thanks to her, I'd participated in the closest thing I hoped to ever get to an orgy. No intercourse, but a lot of hands and bodies touching where they shouldn't have been. Asher was right; I'd done my best to ignore the whole thing. Ignore it hard enough, and it never happened. But of course it had happened, and I'd not dealt with it.
"What do you want me to say? I'm sorry that I'm a little squeamish about having been in bed with four men at the same time. Yeah, it embarrassed me, so sue me."
"Tonight will embarrass you, too."
"A lot of things embarrass me, Asher, I can't help that."
"You cannot help but be who and what you are, Anita. I would not change you, but I also will not be just a night of charity in your bed. I tell you I could not bear being cast out again."
I knew in that instant that he didn't mean me casting him out from our bed after the ardeur. He meant what Belle had done to him all those centuries ago. She had thrown him away like a damaged toy. After all, you can always buy more toys.
I started to pace back and forth in front of him, not looking at either of them, but doing something, anything for the nervous energy that was building up. "What do you want from me, Asher? A guarantee?"
"Yes," he said, at last. "That is exactly what I want from you."
I stopped pacing and looked at him. "What kind of guarantee? That I won't freak out about this tomorrow?" I shook my head. "I'm sorry, I can't promise, because I don't know how I'll feel."
"What will Micah say, if he finds out you've been with me?"
"Micah is okay with it."
Asher looked at me.