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Micah :: Гамильтон Лорел
Страница: 37 из 80"
He nodded.
Another man, I might have accused of bragging, but Micah wasn't bragging. I had a thought. It was almost insightful. "Becky said you hurt her because you were so big, and then you had girls in college who wouldn't even try it. That must have really messed with you."
"It was either a really big plus or a really big minus with women. But most of them, even the ones who said yes, didn't want a standard diet. I was like a novelty." His voice held unhappiness the way it had held anger earlier. "Becky made me feel like a monster for wanting to hurt her, for wanting to be inside her, for wanting sex so badly I'd hurt her. Most of the women I dated made me feel the same way, or like I should have had a dial on my hip and a battery case, like I was some sort of toy they'd bought in a sex store. Just wind me up."
I looked at him again.
"Trust me, Anita, there are just as many bastards out there who are girls as bastards who are guys. Except when a girl treats you like a sex object, it's supposed to be all right because you're a guy and you only want sex anyway, right?"
"The old double standard," I said.
He nodded and patted me. "Until you."
I thought about it for a second. "Wait a minute. How did you know I wouldn't have a problem with your, um, size?"
"You know how wereanimals are always walking around naked, unless you make us put on clothes?"
I smiled. "Not all of you guys are comfortable nudists, but most, yeah."
"First, I'd seen Richard nude, and I knew he had been your lover. He isn't small either." I fought not to blush again. "Second, you'd seen me nude and you hadn't reacted badly."
"So you saw an ex-lover and he was well endowed. And I hadn't told you to be careful where you point that. It might go off."
He smiled. "Something like that."
"How did you know that I hadn't broken up with Richard because he was too much man for me to handle?"
"I asked."
I must have looked as surprised as I felt.
He laughed. "I didn't ask Richard. I asked around and found out he thought you were too bloodthirsty, and he didn't like the police work. None of that bothered me."
"So you took a chance," I said.
He nodded. "And from the moment we made love, I knew I would do anything, anything, to be in your life."
"You said that. It was one of the first things you ever said to me after we'd had sex. That you were my Nimir-Raj, and I was your Nimir-Ra, and you would do anything, be anything I needed, to be in my life."
"I meant it.
He nodded.
Another man, I might have accused of bragging, but Micah wasn't bragging. I had a thought. It was almost insightful. "Becky said you hurt her because you were so big, and then you had girls in college who wouldn't even try it. That must have really messed with you."
"It was either a really big plus or a really big minus with women. But most of them, even the ones who said yes, didn't want a standard diet. I was like a novelty." His voice held unhappiness the way it had held anger earlier. "Becky made me feel like a monster for wanting to hurt her, for wanting to be inside her, for wanting sex so badly I'd hurt her. Most of the women I dated made me feel the same way, or like I should have had a dial on my hip and a battery case, like I was some sort of toy they'd bought in a sex store. Just wind me up."
I looked at him again.
"Trust me, Anita, there are just as many bastards out there who are girls as bastards who are guys. Except when a girl treats you like a sex object, it's supposed to be all right because you're a guy and you only want sex anyway, right?"
"The old double standard," I said.
He nodded and patted me. "Until you."
I thought about it for a second. "Wait a minute. How did you know I wouldn't have a problem with your, um, size?"
"You know how wereanimals are always walking around naked, unless you make us put on clothes?"
I smiled. "Not all of you guys are comfortable nudists, but most, yeah."
"First, I'd seen Richard nude, and I knew he had been your lover. He isn't small either." I fought not to blush again. "Second, you'd seen me nude and you hadn't reacted badly."
"So you saw an ex-lover and he was well endowed. And I hadn't told you to be careful where you point that. It might go off."
He smiled. "Something like that."
"How did you know that I hadn't broken up with Richard because he was too much man for me to handle?"
"I asked."
I must have looked as surprised as I felt.
He laughed. "I didn't ask Richard. I asked around and found out he thought you were too bloodthirsty, and he didn't like the police work. None of that bothered me."
"So you took a chance," I said.
He nodded. "And from the moment we made love, I knew I would do anything, anything, to be in your life."
"You said that. It was one of the first things you ever said to me after we'd had sex. That you were my Nimir-Raj, and I was your Nimir-Ra, and you would do anything, be anything I needed, to be in my life."
"I meant it.