The Colour of Magic   ::   Пратчетт Терри

“Scrdfngh…”

“We’ve got to get out of here before this salvage fleet comes!”

The dishwater light of dawnoozed through the shack’s one window, slopping across the piles of salvaged boxes and bundles that were strewn around the interior. Twoflower grunted again and tried to burrow into the pile of furs and blankets that Tethis had given them.

“Look, there’s all kinds of weapons and stuff in here,” said Rincewind. “He’s gone out somewhere. When he comes back we could overpower him and—and—well, then we can think of something. How about it?”

“That doesn’t sound like a very good idea,” said Twoflower. “Anyhow, it’s a bit ungracious isn’t it?”

“Tough buns,” snapped Rincewind. “This is a rough universe.”

He rummaged through the piles around the walls and selected a heavy, wavy-bladed scimitar that had probably been some pirate’s pride and joy. It looked the sort of weapon that relied as much on its weight as its edge to cause damage. He raised it awkwardly.

“Would he leave that sort of thing around if it could hurt him?” Twoflower wondered aloud.

Rincewind ignored him and took up a position beside the door. When it opened some ten minutes later he moved unhesitatingly, swinging it across the opening at what he judged was the troll’s head height. It swished harmlessly through nothing at all and struck the doorpost, jerking him off his feet and on to the floor.

There was a sigh above him. He looked up into Tethis’ face, which was shaking sadly from side to side.

“It wouldn’t have harmed me,” said the troll, “but nevertheless, I am hurt. Deeply hurt.” He reached over the wizard and jerked the sword out of the wood. With no apparent effort he bent its blade into a circle and sent it bowling away over the rocks until it hit a stone and sprang, still spinning, in a silver arc that ended in the mists forming over the Rimfall.

“Very deeply hurt,” he concluded. He reached down beside the door and tossed a sack towards Twoflower.

“It’s the carcass of a deer that is just about how you humans like it, and a few lobsters, and a sea salmon. The Circumfence provides,” he said casually.

He looked hard at the tourist, and then down again at Rincewind.

“What are you staring at?” he said.

“It’s just that—” said Twoflower.

“—compared to last night—” said Rincewind.

“You’re so small,” finished Twoflower.

“I see, said the troll carefully.”Personal remarks now.” He drew himself up to his full height, which was currently about four feet.