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"I fear we have to welcome Lord Kiely and his men," he said after a few seconds, "even while we distrust them, and so it seems to me, my Lord, that we must do our best to make them uncomfortable. So uncomfortable that they either go back to Madrid or else march down to Cadiz."
"We drive them out?" Wellington said. "How?"
"Partly, my Lord, by bivouacking them so close to the French that those guardsmen who wish to desert will find it easy. At the same time, my Lord, we say that we have put them in a place of danger as a compliment to their fighting reputation, despite which, my Lord, I think we must assume that the Real Companпa Irlandesa , while undoubtedly skilled at guarding palace gates, will prove less skilled at the more mundane task of fighting the French. We should therefore insist that they submit to a period of strict training under the supervision of someone who can be trusted to make their life a living misery."
Wellington gave a grim smile. "Make these ceremonial soldiers stoop, eh? Make them chew on humble pie till it chokes them?"
"Exactly, my Lord. I have no doubt that they expect to be treated with respect and even privilege, so we must disappoint them. We'll have to give them a liaison officer, someone senior enough to smooth Lord Kiely's feathers and allay General Valverde's suspicions, but why not give them a drillmaster too? A tyrant, but someone shrewd enough to smoke out their secrets."
Wellington smiled, then turned his horse back towards his aides. He knew exactly who Hogan had in mind. "I doubt our Lord Kiely will much like Mister Sharpe," the General said.
"I cannot think they'll take to each other, my Lord, no."
"Where is Sharpe?"
"He should be on his way to Vilar Formoso today, my Lord. He's an unhappy recruit to the Town Major's staff."
"So he'll be glad to be cumbered with Kiely instead then, won't he? And who do we appoint as liaison officer?"
"Any emollient fool will do for that post, my Lord."
"Very well, Hogan, I'll find the fool and you arrange the rest." The General touched his heels to his horse's flank. His aides, seeing the General ready to move, gathered their reins, then Wellington paused. "What does a man want with a common milking stool, Hogan?"
"It keeps his arse dry during wet nights of sentry duty, my Lord."
"Clever thought, Hogan. Can't think why I didn't come up with the idea myself. Well done." Wellington wheeled his horse and spurred west away from the battle's litter.
Hogan watched the General go, then grimaced.
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