Ыоуве Been Warned   ::   Patterson James

I’m tempted to keep walking toward the elevator, not give her the satisfaction, but my curiosity wins out. Maybe I need to solve a mystery, any mystery. I unlock my box and remove a pile of catalogues, bills, and other assorted junk mail.

It’s right on top.

An envelope from Priority Holdings, the management company that owns the building. Inside is a one-page letter, single-spaced.

Dear Ms. Burns:

Due to continuing complaints from other tenants regarding your conduct, we will not be offering you a rent renewal on your apartment when your current lease expires. Under New York State law you have the right to contest this decision and request an administrative hearing in accordance with the New York City Housing Authority.

There’s another paragraph about whom to contact, but my attention immediately focuses on whom to blame for this outrage. I don’t have to look far.

“This was your doing, wasn’t it?”

Mrs. Rosencrantz strikes a priggish pose. “I tend to think you did it to yourself.”

“Unbelievable. You really have nothing better to do with your time, huh?” I say, shaking the letter in her face.

“It’s not like I didn’t warn you this morning.”

“This morning?”

“You were terribly rude to me at your door. You have no manners, young woman. None.”

“Mrs. Rosencrantz, for your information that wasn’t this morning; that was a week ago.”

“My information is fine, Ms. Burns. I think I know when I knocked on your apartment door.”

“Apparently you don’t. And in any event, if you think I’m going to let you get away with this, you’re sadly mistaken. I’ll fight this like you won’t believe.”

“Go ahead, make all the noise you want. Scream, if you have to. Lord knows you’re good at that.”

Oh, is she asking for it!

For the first time in my life, I’m tempted to punch an old lady. And what’s with her memory? She can’t even get her days straight.

But I keep my cool. I summon every last ounce of willpower and walk away. You’ve got bigger fish to fry, Kris.

I move to the elevator and press the up button. As I wait, another letter from the building’s management catches my eye. A note, really. It’s taped to the wall.

Due to a problem with the furnace, the building was without hot water for a brief period early this morning. We apologize for any inconvenience.

Obviously, the note is from a week ago and they forgot to take it down. Boy, do I remember that cold shower!

But as I look closer, there’s just one problem.