JК
Danse Macabre :: Гамильтон Лорел
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«Sorry, how will Jean-Claude feel about being a daddy?»
«It's probably not his.»
She looked at me. «You're having sex with him, a lot. Why isn't it his?»
«Because he's more than four hundred years old and when vampires get that old, they aren't very fertile. That goes for Asher and Damian, too.»
«Oh, God,» she said. «I'd forgotten that you had sex with Damian.»
«Yeah,» I said.
She covered her eyes with her hands. «I'm sorry, Anita. I'm sorry that it's weirding me out that my uptight monogamous friend is suddenly sleeping with not one, but three vampires.»
«I didn't plan it that way.»
«I know that.» She hugged me, and I stayed stiff against her. She wasn't being comforting enough for me to relax in her arms. She hugged me tighter. «I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm being a jerk. But if it's not the vampires then who else but your houseboys.»
I pulled away from her. «Don't call them my houseboys. They have names, and just because I like living with someone, and you don't, don't make that my problem.»
«Fine, that leaves Micah and Nathaniel.»
«Micah is fixed, remember? So it can't be him.»
Her eyes went wide. «That leaves Nathaniel. Jesus, Anita, Nathaniel as the father-to-be.»
A moment ago I might have agreed with her, but now it pissed me off. It wasn't her place to disparage my boyfriends. «What's wrong with Nathaniel?» I said, and my voice was not entirely happy.
She put her hands on her hips and gave me a look. «He's twenty and a stripper. Twenty-year-old strippers are the entertainment at your bachelorette party. You don't have babies with them.»
I let the anger seep into my eyes. «Nathaniel told me you didn't see him as real, as a person. I told him he was wrong. I told him you were my friend, and you wouldn't disrespect him like that. I guess I was wrong.»
She didn't back down or apologize. She was angry and staying that way. «Last time I checked, Nathaniel was supposed to be food, just food, not the love of your life.»
«I didn't say he was the love of my life, and yeah, he started out as my pomme de sang , but that doesn't…»
But she interrupted me. «Your apple of blood, right, that's what pomme de sang means?»
I nodded.
«If you were a vampire you'd be taking blood from your little stripper, but thanks to that bloodsucking son of a bitch you have to feed off sex.
«Sorry, how will Jean-Claude feel about being a daddy?»
«It's probably not his.»
She looked at me. «You're having sex with him, a lot. Why isn't it his?»
«Because he's more than four hundred years old and when vampires get that old, they aren't very fertile. That goes for Asher and Damian, too.»
«Oh, God,» she said. «I'd forgotten that you had sex with Damian.»
«Yeah,» I said.
She covered her eyes with her hands. «I'm sorry, Anita. I'm sorry that it's weirding me out that my uptight monogamous friend is suddenly sleeping with not one, but three vampires.»
«I didn't plan it that way.»
«I know that.» She hugged me, and I stayed stiff against her. She wasn't being comforting enough for me to relax in her arms. She hugged me tighter. «I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm being a jerk. But if it's not the vampires then who else but your houseboys.»
I pulled away from her. «Don't call them my houseboys. They have names, and just because I like living with someone, and you don't, don't make that my problem.»
«Fine, that leaves Micah and Nathaniel.»
«Micah is fixed, remember? So it can't be him.»
Her eyes went wide. «That leaves Nathaniel. Jesus, Anita, Nathaniel as the father-to-be.»
A moment ago I might have agreed with her, but now it pissed me off. It wasn't her place to disparage my boyfriends. «What's wrong with Nathaniel?» I said, and my voice was not entirely happy.
She put her hands on her hips and gave me a look. «He's twenty and a stripper. Twenty-year-old strippers are the entertainment at your bachelorette party. You don't have babies with them.»
I let the anger seep into my eyes. «Nathaniel told me you didn't see him as real, as a person. I told him he was wrong. I told him you were my friend, and you wouldn't disrespect him like that. I guess I was wrong.»
She didn't back down or apologize. She was angry and staying that way. «Last time I checked, Nathaniel was supposed to be food, just food, not the love of your life.»
«I didn't say he was the love of my life, and yeah, he started out as my pomme de sang , but that doesn't…»
But she interrupted me. «Your apple of blood, right, that's what pomme de sang means?»
I nodded.
«If you were a vampire you'd be taking blood from your little stripper, but thanks to that bloodsucking son of a bitch you have to feed off sex.