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Five Little Pigs :: Christie Agatha
Страница: 112 из 147’
I said: ‘What are you afraid of then?’
And then he said slowly: ‘I don’t know…’
You see, he knew Caroline. I didn’t.
If I’d had any idea…
We went down again to Alderbury. Things were difficult this time. Caroline had got suspicious. I didn’t like it-I didn’t like it-I didn’t like it a bit. I’ve always hated deceit and concealment. I thought we ought to tell her. Amyas wouldn’t hear of it.
The funny part of it was that he didn’t really care at all. In spite of being fond of Caroline and not wanting to hurt her, he just didn’t care about the honesty or dishonesty of it all. He was painting with a kind of frenzy, and nothing else mattered. I hadn’t seen him in one of his working spells before. I realized now what a really great genius he was. It was natural for him to be so carried away that all the ordinary decencies didn’t matter. But it was different for me. I was in a horrible position. Caroline resented me-and quite rightly. The only thing to put the position quite straight was to be honest and tell her the truth.
But all Amyas would say was that he wasn’t going to be bothered with scenes and fusses until he’d finished the picture. I said there probably wouldn’t be a scene. Caroline would have too much dignity and pride for that.
I said: ‘I want to be honest about it all. We’vegot to be honest!’
Amyas said: ‘To hell with honesty. I’m painting a picture, damn it.’
I did see his point of view, but he wouldn’t see mine.
And in the end I broke down. Caroline had been talking of some plan she and Amyas were going to carry out next autumn. She talked about it quite confidently. And I suddenly felt it was too abominable, what we were doing-letting her go on like this-and perhaps, too, I was angry, because she was really being very unpleasant to me in a clever sort of way that one couldn’t take hold of.
And so I came out with the truth. In a way, I still think I was right. Though, of course, I wouldn’t have done it if I’d had the faintest idea what was to come of it.
The clash came right away. Amyas was furious with me, but he had to admit that what I had said was true.
I didn’t understand Caroline at all. We all went over to Meredith Blake’s to tea, and Caroline played up marvellously-talking and laughing. Like a fool, I thought she was taking it well. It was awkward my not being able to leave the house, but Amyas would have gone up in smoke if I had. I thought perhaps Caroline would go. It would have made it much easier for us if she had.
I didn’t see her take the coniine.
I said: ‘What are you afraid of then?’
And then he said slowly: ‘I don’t know…’
You see, he knew Caroline. I didn’t.
If I’d had any idea…
We went down again to Alderbury. Things were difficult this time. Caroline had got suspicious. I didn’t like it-I didn’t like it-I didn’t like it a bit. I’ve always hated deceit and concealment. I thought we ought to tell her. Amyas wouldn’t hear of it.
The funny part of it was that he didn’t really care at all. In spite of being fond of Caroline and not wanting to hurt her, he just didn’t care about the honesty or dishonesty of it all. He was painting with a kind of frenzy, and nothing else mattered. I hadn’t seen him in one of his working spells before. I realized now what a really great genius he was. It was natural for him to be so carried away that all the ordinary decencies didn’t matter. But it was different for me. I was in a horrible position. Caroline resented me-and quite rightly. The only thing to put the position quite straight was to be honest and tell her the truth.
But all Amyas would say was that he wasn’t going to be bothered with scenes and fusses until he’d finished the picture. I said there probably wouldn’t be a scene. Caroline would have too much dignity and pride for that.
I said: ‘I want to be honest about it all. We’vegot to be honest!’
Amyas said: ‘To hell with honesty. I’m painting a picture, damn it.’
I did see his point of view, but he wouldn’t see mine.
And in the end I broke down. Caroline had been talking of some plan she and Amyas were going to carry out next autumn. She talked about it quite confidently. And I suddenly felt it was too abominable, what we were doing-letting her go on like this-and perhaps, too, I was angry, because she was really being very unpleasant to me in a clever sort of way that one couldn’t take hold of.
And so I came out with the truth. In a way, I still think I was right. Though, of course, I wouldn’t have done it if I’d had the faintest idea what was to come of it.
The clash came right away. Amyas was furious with me, but he had to admit that what I had said was true.
I didn’t understand Caroline at all. We all went over to Meredith Blake’s to tea, and Caroline played up marvellously-talking and laughing. Like a fool, I thought she was taking it well. It was awkward my not being able to leave the house, but Amyas would have gone up in smoke if I had. I thought perhaps Caroline would go. It would have made it much easier for us if she had.
I didn’t see her take the coniine.