Danse Macabre   ::   Гамильтон Лорел

I wanted to take that lost look out of his eyes, so I hugged him, andhe let me, and he hugged me back.

«What happened to Jeanie?» Micah asked.

He stiffened in my arms, and I knew then it would not be a good answer. «She died. She got into the wrong car one night, and the date killed her.»

I hugged him tighter. «I am so sorry, Nathaniel.»

He hugged me, one fierce, tight hug, then he moved back enough to see my face. «I was thirteen and she was fifteen. We were street hookers. We were both drug addicts. There wasn't going to be a baby.» His eyes were so serious. «I'm twenty, and you're twenty-seven. We both have good jobs, money, a house. I've been clean for three, almost four years.»

I pulled back from him. «What are you saying?»

«I'm saying we have choices, Anita. Choices that I didn't have the last time.»

My pulse was in my throat, threatening to choke me. «Even if I am — «and it took me two tries to say — «pregnant, I'm not sure I'm keeping it. You understand that, right?» My chest was so tight I could barely breathe.

«It's your body,» he said. «I respect that. I'm just saying that we have more than one way to go here, that's all. It has to be mostly your choice.»

«Yes,» Micah said, «you're the woman, and like it or not, the final choice has to be yours.»

«Your body, your choice,» Nathaniel said, «but we need a pregnancy test. We need to know.»

«We're running late now,» I said. «You guys need to shower and we have to go to Jean-Claude's place.»

«Can you really just go to the cocktail party with this hanging over us?» Nathaniel asked.

«I have to.»

He shook his head. «It's fashionable to be late, and once he knows why, Jean-Claude won't mind.»

«But…«I said.

«He's right,» Micah said, «or am I the only one that thinks I would go crazy smiling and nodding tonight, and not knowing?»

I hugged myself tighter. «But what if it's positive, what if…«I couldn't even finish it.

«Then we'll deal with it,» Micah said.

«Whatever happens, Anita, it will be okay. I promise,» Nathaniel said.

It was my turn to look into his face and realize how young he was. We were only seven years apart in age, but they could be an important seven years. He promised it would be all right, but some promises you can't keep no matter how hard you try.

That tight feeling climbed up my throat and spilled out my eyes. I started to cry, and couldn't stop it. Nathaniel wrapped his arms around me, held me against his body, and a moment later Micah moved in behind me.